Some kids are confident, proud of their achievements, and believe they can improve themselves to achieve the things they can’t do. They feel accepted and are risk-takers. On the other hand, some kids manifest poor self-esteem.
Children with unhealthy self-esteem often compare themselves to others. They get overly emotional whenever they fail and you can see them doing negative self-talk. They either give up too soon or are unwilling to try thinking they will only fail in the process. Also, kids with low self-esteem hate receiving compliments and can’t take criticisms.
Is your daughter showing some of these signs? Know that it is never too late to encourage your daughter to build her self-esteem. But like what they always say, woman empowerment should always start at the comfort of your kid’s home. The following are just some of the things you will want to avoid so you can help build your little one’s self-esteem.
Failure to Walk Your Talk
Do you always find you criticizing yourself? Do you engage in negative self-talk? You may be doing this unknowingly, but your daughter may already be picking up all these bad habits.
Stop yourself from doing self-criticism and negative self-talk. Be a good example and show her how to appreciate herself for who and what she is. You can encourage her to be kind to herself by being kind to yourself first. Remember that your kids look up to you.
Never let your daughter see you criticizing yourself for the way you look and for the things you feel you did wrong. Instead, celebrate yourself by practicing self-love. Pursue your hobbies and encourage your daughter to do the same. For instance, if they are into arts, you can try searching for a local company that offers printing services. You can surprise your daughter by getting their arts reprinted and handing their artworks all over the house.
Show your daughter that it is okay to make mistakes. Teach her to own up to her wrongs doings and to strive harder to do better next time. Show her not to fear failure. Show her how to be grateful and to avoid comparing herself to others. Also, use positive words to yourself and others.
Overpraising Your Daughter
Parents are often tempted to praise their kids in an attempt to boost their confidence. But what many parents fail to realize that there are good and bad ways to praise kids. For one, parents should avoid praising your kid’s traits. What you need to pay attention instead is your daughter’s efforts and achievement.
Some people tend to praise little girls for their looks. Doing so can unknowingly tie your daughter’s look with their self-worth. What you can do instead is to praise your daughter for the things she did, like how she fixed her hair or how she dressed up for the day. Focus your praise on the things she has control over. Strike a conversation and let her talk about their wants, desires, and interests.
Encouraging your daughter for their effort will motivate her to try harder in the future. It does not even matter if your child managed to succeed or failed in an activity. Praise her for the effort and you get to show your daughter that you believe they can succeed and do better the next time around.
Praising your kid the right way helps make them confident and motivated. A research was conducted to see what process praise can do to kids. After five years, the kids whose parents praised their work, efforts, and actions grew up to have a more positive attitude when it comes to academic challenges. If you can continue praising your daughter for the things that they have control over, they will grow up to be better and more confident adults.
Practicing Perfectionist Parenting
Expectations are good but only if they are realistic. But, perfectionist parents are the very reason why their kids grow up to be unhappy and insecure. A study claims that, more often than not, working mothers are perfectionist parents. The stress from work along with all the responsibilities they have back home makes them want their kids to be nothing short of perfect.
Kids who believe their parents expect them to be perfect are at greater risk for developing certain mental health issues, like anxiety and depression. Instead of expecting your daughter to be a perfect lady, give her some slack. Stop comparing your little one to others and focus on her efforts. Whenever she feels overwhelmed, give her space but show your support.
Sometimes, parents don’t realize that they are already the ones who are hurting their children’s self-esteem. No good parent would want their little ones to grow up shy and with low self-confidence. As early as possible, be a good example and start praising your daughter the right way. Stop yourself from your perfectionist tendencies and instead give her the support she needs.